Why do you hate me?
by XxStephXx
Summary: Lily Evans just can't understand why James Potter is ignoring her, what makes it worse is that she's fallen in love with him, but know he doesn't want to ONE SHOT


Hey everyone, I know I probably shouldn't be starting a new story cause I haven't finished my other ones, but I wanted to do a fluffy one shot, so here it is.

* * *

Lily Evans sat in front of the fire in the head common room, the common room she shared with none other than James Potter.

Lily had used to hate James, she had thought he was a cocky arrogant git, and he was, well he used to be. At the start of 7th year he had changed, he wasn't cocky or arrogant anymore, he stopped hexing people, he tutored the first years, he did his homework on time, he stopped going out with girls for a week and then dumping them.

But most importantly, he had stopped asking Lily out.

James used to ask Lily out at least twice a day, everyday from 2nd year, right up to the last day of 6th year. At the start of 7th something was different, he had changed matured, he had asked her out on the train, but Lily couldn't see right away that he had changed and she turned him down again, quite cruelly.

_FLASHBACK_

_"Hi Lily" said James pleasantly_

_"Potter" she said coldly_

_"How are you?"_

_"I was actually in a good mood until you turned up"_

_"Oh sorry, does my presence annoy you that much"_

_"Yes"_

_"I uh just wanted to apologise for uh how I've treated you over the years, pranking you and everything, and I was wondering if you would go out with me?"_

_"ARGGHHH Potter for the last time I WILL NEVER GO OUT WITH YOU. I HATE YOU, I DESPISE YOU. NOW LEAVE ME ALONE I WISH I NEVER HAD TO SEE YOU AGAIN" shouted Lily._

_James didn't say anything he hung his head and left the carriage._

PRESENT

Since that time on the train, James hadn't asked Lily out at all. At the start of the year, they had been civil to each other, they could even had become friends, because Lily was beginning to see that James had changed. But James had pulled away, and stopped being friendly with Lily, he was never nasty or horrible or even impolite, but he had started to find excuses not to spend anytime with her, he wouldn't even do patrols with her, he spent her notes about official head business, that had really hurt Lily.

_'he didn't even talk to me about things like Hogsmade weekends. He probably realised after spending time with me, that I wasn't the sort of person he thought I was and realised he really didn't like me. Or he just got fed up, maybe he likes someone else, maybe he's with someone else right now'_ thought Lily miserably as she pictured James with another girl. _'why won't he just talk to me, just a simple hello, then I could tell him that I love him. But he wouldn't be interested, he and his new girlfriend would probably just have a good laugh at me. It's not fair, why couldn't I love him when he at least liked me, or when he could even stand to be in the same room as me'_

Just then Lily heard someone coming into the common room and turned to see who it was, (although only she and James had the password).

* * *

JAMES' POV

I climbed through the potrait hole, I had been tutoring some first years. I got quite a suprise when I saw Lily sitting staring at the fire, she was usually at the Slug Club on a Wednesday evening, it's a bit strange how well I know her schedule, it's because I've studied her. Ever since I was 11 I have adored Lily Evans, eventually fell in love with her, when we both got heads I thought that it would be the perfect opportunity to show her how I feel and how much I've changed for her. I had thought it was working, but then I heard her talking to Alice, she told her that she was only being civil to me because we were heads. That was more painful to hear than all the rejections she gave me over the years and believe me they hurt, each and everyone of them. It was then that I decided to stop being selfish, I love Lily, I wanted her to be happy, even if it was without me, so I started avoiding her and stopped talking to her. All I could do was occasionally glance at her when she wasn't watching, and it's been killing me inside to see her everyday and not talk to her, or even be near her, the only thing keeping me going is knowing that she's happy that I've finally made her happy.

* * *

"Oh uh sorry, I thought you were out, I'll just go to my room" I say clumsily, all the while thinking how beautiful, she looking with the glow from the fire reflecting on her gorgeous face.

"No, uh I mean you don't have to" she said.

"No, I want to... no I didn't mean that I didn't want to..." he stuttered then he just mumbled, "I should go to my room"

_'he doesn't want to be in the same room as me, he isn't even trying to hide it'_ thought Lily and suddenly she wanted to know why, okay so he didn't fancy her anymore, there was no need to openly admit that he couldn't stand to be in the same room as her for a few seconds.

James had turned to go into his room, when he heard Lily say,

"James, can I ask you something?"

"Uh okay," he said silently pleading to be let go, he couldn't stand it, everytime he saw her he just wanted to hold her, to make her smile. But he knew he'd only get a slap and make her angry.

"Why do you hate me?"

"What?" exclaimed James, turning round in shock,

_'how could she think I hate her, when I'm doing all of this for her. I'm making my life a living hell for her. How could she ever think I could hate her, she's perfect'_

"Why do you hate me?" she repeated.

"I-I don't ... know what you're talking about"

"Oh no then why haven't you said two words to me in months"

"I-I've been busy"

"busy, we share a common room and you won't even say good morning, you go out of your way to avoid me"

"I-I don't"

"So you're not going to tell me"

"There's nothing to tell you"

"Fine" said Lily turning back towards the fire.

James turned to go into his room, when he heard Lily mumble,

"I never thought you were a cruel person, guess I was wrong"

Now James was mad.

"Me, cruel" he said

"Well what else would you call it"

"Well what about you, don't you think it was cruel how you turned me down, time and time again, getting nastier and nastier, if you want to know what real cruelty is look in the mirror"

"Well I'm sorry about that and if I could take it back I would and that wasn't intentional. But what you're doing is intentional, making someone fall in love with you just so can ignore them and watch them suffer. What is it? Some sort sort of sick revenge for all the times I turned you down."

"Newsflash the world doesn't revolve around you" said James and then he stormed into his room slamming the door.

When he got into his room, he put his head in his hands and slid down his door, it took a few seconds to realise that Lily had said that she loved him.

He opened his door, just as Lily was going into her room.

"No wait" he said grabbing her wrist, but she didn't turn round to face him.

"What" she snapped, "I thought you were ignoring me"

"Did you mean it?"

"Mean what? That you haven't said two words to me in months, yeah I did"

"Thats not what I'm talking about and you know it"

"Let go of me" said Lily trying to pull her wrist from James' grasp, but he wasn't letting go.

"Not until you tell me, if you meant it when you said you loved me"

"Why? So that you and you're new girlfriend can have a good laugh at me"

"What?" said James shock getting the better of him again, he let go of Lily's wrist, "What new girlfriend, what the hell are you on about?"

"Your new tart. Thats who you were with, wasn't it"

"I was tutoring first years" said James raising his voice.

"THEN WHY DID YOU STOP LIKING ME AND START IGNORING ME"

"BECAUSE YOU ASKED ME TO, YOU TOLD ME TO LEAVE YOU ALONE"

"SO... I DIDN'T MEAN IT"

"HOW THE HELL WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT?"

Lily didn't have an answer instead she just looked shocked that James had lost his temper, and was shouting at her. She didn't know what made her do it, but she stepped onto her tiptoes and kissed James on the lip gently at first, but as soon as he started responding, she deepened the kiss. she loved the way he kissed and how he tasted, it was better than she had ever imagined.

James couldn't believe it he was kissing LILY EVANS, the girl of his dreams, the girl he loved, who he had adored since he was 11.

Then Lily pulled back abruptly ending the kiss, she turned and fled to her room, for a few seconds James just stood, Lily had for the third time in 10 minutes shocked him to the point where he couldn't move. But then he came to his sense and went over to her bedroom door and knocked.

"Go away" came the muffled reply.

"No Lily we have to talk, you can either open up or I'll knock the door down" he shouted

Then he heard the door unlock,

"I'm coming in" he said, when he got no reply he opened the door and found Lily lying on her bed curled up in a ball, facing away from him.

"What?" she said.

"Y-you kissed me" he stuttered unable to think of anything else to say.

"Well, I'm sure your girlfriend will understand if you tell her it was a moment of insanity" she said.

"Lily" he said sitting down, "Lily look at me"

She didn't move.

"Lily, come on" he said touching her shoulder, "do I have to be the mature one here"

Lily then sat up and faced James, bringing her knees up the her chin.

"I don't have a girlfriend. Who told you I did?"

"No'one" she said quietly, "I just thought..."

"Why would you think that, when you should know that I love you"

That got her attention, she looked up at him, "I-I didn't know. I thought you hated me"

"No, how could you ever think that?"

"Y-you stopped talking to me, started ignoring me, you wouldn't even look at me" she said as tears started to roll down her face.

"I-I'm sorry I thought it would make you happy" he said gently wiping the tears from her face, "please don't cry, don't get upset because of me, I'm not worth your tears"

"Yes you are"

"No please stop don't cry because of me"

Lily just looked at him trying to stop herself crying. She just looked so adorable and vulnerable to James all he wanted to do was hold her and tell her everything was okay and that he loved her, but he wasn't sure and he didn't want to upset her even more.

Almost as if she was reading his mind, Lily shifted and threw her arms around his neck, hugging him. He immediately responded pulling her onto his lap, she dropped her arms from his neck, he put his arms round one of her shoulders, and the other round her waist.

"Shhh it's okay, it'll all be alright, I promise" he said soothingly.

By this time Lily had calmed down, but she was in no hurry to move from her current position.

"Now will you please tell me, did you mean what you said?" said James.

"About you being cruel, no I didn't" teased Lily

"Lily Marie Evans you better tell me right now, do you love me or not"

"Yes" she said turning in his lap to face him, so that she was practically straddling him, "Yes I do love you"

James didn't need to hear anymore, he slipped his arms around Lily's waist and pulled her towards him and kissed her, never wanting to stop.

* * *

A FEW HOURS LATER

James and Lily were lying in front of the fire together,

"So James, you never did tell me why you started ignoring me" said Lily snuggling into him,

"You promise not to get mad at me"

"Why do I have a reason to get mad" she said getting up.

"Well you might" he said.

"Tell me then" she said worried now, she didn't want anything to destroy what she had just found with James, and his amazing kisses.

"Well it was when we were getting along, you were in here talking to Alice and I overheard you telling her that you were only being civil to me because we were heads" he said.

Instantly Lily felt terrible, "James I'm so sorry, I didn't mean it I swear. I was just so confused that I had started liking you I-I wasn't ready to admit it and I-I don't know, I'm sorry"

"Don't be" he said gently, pulling Lily back down with him.

"Wait, why would I be mad at you for that, if anything you should be mad at me" she said.

"I'll never be mad at you. I thought you'd be mad at me for listening in on your private conversation"

"No you can listen in as much as you want cause you'll only hear good things about you from now on"

"okay"

"Wait that still doesn't explain it, you should have stopped talking to me for a week, not 6 months"

"I um wanted you to happy and I thought that me leaving you alone would make you happy"

"aww that is the sweetest thing" said Lily then she kissed him, "but you ended up making us both miserable"

"Yeah, sorry"

"Stop apologising" said Lily then she started kissing James again.

"I love you"

"Love you more"

"Not possible Lily, that's just not possible"


End file.
